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Daily blog #71

Fear

It’s hard to believe how quickly we are coming up to blog post #100. Time really does fly! 70 blog posts ago I embarked on this challenge to post daily for many reasons which I won’t go into. Not long before that I recall a conversation with my brother where I stated that vlogging seemed to be a better medium for me than blogging… Of course there were some glaring flaws in my thinking which you may have already noticed. One, it was an excuse to not start my blog! And two, I hadn’t put in enough practice to know whether blogging would be a good fit for my personality. Third, what you may not have noticed, I WAS AFRAID of what people would think. I didn’t want to make the commitment because deep down I had insecurities about my grammar, my ability to communicate effectively, and most of all whether or not anyone would even care. I look back and see myself making the classic beginner mistake of “paralysis by analysis” where we reach conclusions that lack information through trial and error. Oftentimes we learn best through experience because it allows us to live a story which our brain remembers best. The movies you remember the most, often tell the best story. I’m certainly not great at blogging but I am definitely more comfortable in my own skin and don’t get nervous about posting like I did early on.

In 2017 while preparing for the IBJJF world championships in San Diego California, I had the fortune to sit next to Judo Olympian Travis Stevens during lunch. My coach Saulo Ribeiro was across from me correcting some mistakes from training earlier to which I was resistant and defending them (rookie mistake). Lucky for me Travis interjected and told me “If I can say something, those are coaching decisions, as an athlete you are not qualified to make coaching decisions, your job is just to focus on fighting hard and let the coaches worry about what you need to change technically.”. What a valuable lesson. Too often our need to protect ourselves and our ego has negative consequences which impede our overall progress. By recognizing this fear of being wrong and the “humiliation” that is associated with it, we can learn to roll with the punches life throws and realize that many uncomfortable moments such as receiving criticism from a coach or friend, are actually in our best interest. Wrestling with our egos is a daily struggle but understand how critical it is to our growth and our success. Behind many of the short term failures we will encounter in life will we break free of the chains that are keeping us from our greatness.